Finding New Ways to Torture You!

    On June 25th I will be posting the first chapter of my book here on the blog.  Just so you can get a taste of what is to come!  Make sure to check back often so you don't miss anything.  I am also thinking up another giveaway.

xoxo,
Michelle Graves

Book Trailer

Here it is!  My very first book trailer.  I am sure with time I will get better at making them.  For now I am pretty stinking excited with this one!  Enjoy and please feel free to share!

xoxo,
Michelle Graves

Fear (Life Lessons with Izzy)

   This is the last of the Life Lessons with Izzy series.  I saved this one for last, because quite frankly fear is not something I especially like to face.  There are so many things in this life that I am afraid of and I knew that I would have to fess up to quite a few of them.  I, much like Izzy, like to repress and avoid things whenever possible.  Yes, I know, it is not exactly a healthy practice to take up this denial method.  See, I am doing it right now, avoiding.  Ick, fine, on with the fear.  Time to fess up and face it.

   I think fear is as constant as change in our lives.  Everyone is afraid of something.  Whether it be spiders, the dark, or small spaces.  We are all terrified of something.  There are a few things that genuinely scare me.  The first is honestly the dark.  I, an almost thirty year old, still need a light on somewhere to fall asleep.  I know it is ridiculous.  I know that the dark itself will not hurt me.  There is just something in my overactive imagination that takes hold and convinces me that there is something lurking unseen.  I think perhaps it is more a fear of the unknown than the dark itself. 

    The forest at night, don't even get me started on that.  I love to camp but when we go I have to have a flashlight and chem lights.  There might be bears.  I am just saying.  My husband, the tough Army man he is, thinks it is hilarious.  Yet, he will still climb out of the tent and keep watch for me if I have to run to the bathroom.  I seriously married a saint ya'll!  I know that there will never be a point in my life when I will be comfortable with the dark.  We will always be at odds.

   My other biggest fear, one that I don't often talk about, is losing my husband.  First, you have to understand who he is to me.  My husband is my best friend.  He is the strength that keeps me going when I falter under the pressure.  He is my everything.  I have never and will never love anyone the way that I love him.  Almost seven years into our relationship and I love him more today than I ever have.  So my fear of losing him, well it is because he is my other half.  He is the other piece of my soul.  When I am sad, he is.  When he hurts, I hurt.  Quite literally.  It is freaky.

  Sorry, I got off on a tangent.  Back to the fear portion.  My fear of losing him.  He has a dangerous job.  It is a job he loves and believes in, but it is not a safe one.  I know that every time he leaves the house for a training cycle, field problem, or deployment it may well be the last time I see him.  I never openly say it out loud.  In fact, this may be the first time I have ever admitted this to most people.  I get a lump in my throat when I say goodbye to him that stays there until I say hello once more.  He is strong, smart, and great at what he does.  I know that he will stay as safe as he can and that if it is his time, then there is absolutely nothing I can do about it.  That does not change the fear.  I love him with every fiber of my being and to combat my fear of losing him I try to live every second I have with him to its fullest.

   In the book, Izzy has to face an extraordinary amount of her own fears.  She is put through so many tests.  If it were me in her place I would have broken.  I guess I wrote her as someone I aspire to be.  I hope that someday I can face up to my fears and turn them into a strength rather than a weakness.

  "Each new nightmare brought on a new horror until finally he brought one that even I could not refute.  Not even in the dreaming.   He took me and locked me in a coffin.  I laid there as the air slowly started to seep out of the box leaving me without any oxygen.  I fought against the box and struggled.  I knew that he would leave me like this.  I knew that if I did not lift my wards I would spend the rest of my life in this tiny lightless box."  -Izzy in "See How She Runs"

Check back soon for the cover reveal and release date info.  I might even be working up another prequel.  You never really know what I am up to!  

xoxo,

Michelle 

Just a little funny.

Some days I just need a chuckle.  This picture did the trick today, so I thought I might spread the joy!

xoxo,
Michelle

Change (Life Lessons with Izzy)

    Change.  It is something we must all face at one point or another in our lives.  Often times we have absolutely no control over what changes come our way.   Sometimes we, ourselves, can be the catalyst of great change.  Change is simultaneously frightening and exciting.  There is no road map to follow, no instruction manual, and no guarantee on what may be found on the other side.

   Change is something that I became well acquainted with at a very young age.   I moved once every few years growing up and in that time I learned a lot about change.  My life forced me to change schools, change houses, and even at times change countries.  I learned to embrace it all.  Sometimes, we would move to a place and the kids would all think I was completely weird.  While other times we would move and I would be welcomed into the social fold as if I had always been a part of the pack.

   I think the thing I took away from my upbringing the most was that change is inevitable.  No matter how I may wish for things to always be as they are something will shift.  Change finds us all in the end.  But I don't have to let change control me or make me cower in fear.  I can face the changes that come my way.  I can face the circumstances I am met with and I can make the absolute best of total crap situations.  It is all entirely in my power.

   I understand that there are situations where it seems impossible to look on the bright side.  Where in fact there is only a slightly less dark side to be seen in the grand scheme.  But, even in those situations, I have learned that it is not permanent.  That darkness will not last forever because like always change will come again.  I have come to realize that I cannot linger in the past no matter how lovely the past may be.  I must face the changes that come my way.  I must decide how I will react to the changes, good or bad, and move forward with my life.  Without change, we become stagnant.




Izzy is faced with a great many changes in her life.  She finds out things about her past and herself that she never knew.  She can let this change swallow her whole or she can embrace it and see where it may lead.
 
"My dreams were her trying to warn me.  There was someone after me for a reason

I had yet to discover.  I felt as though the past twenty four years of my life had been a lie.
I needed to know more.  I needed to feel like I had at least a semblance of control over
my life.  And on top of everything Kennan was being too nice.  It was freaking me out.
I took a steadying breath and sat up.  It was time I got my head wrapped around
all of this."- Izzy in "See How She Runs"



The release is getting closer... just a few short months away!  Keep coming back for more life lessons with Izzy!

xoxo,
Michelle

ANNOUNCEMENT

  I have moved part one and two of the prequel under the page at the top See How She Socializes!  Be sure to check back.  I will be adding part three to that page as well.  Don't worry, I have left dividers so that you will be able to easily find the beginning of each part! 

Here is the link to make it a bit easier:
See How She Socializes

xoxo,
Michelle

Strength (Life Lessons with Izzy)

 
   Strength.  It is one of those things that conjures different images.  To some it might bring thoughts of body builders and super heroes, while to others it brings about thoughts of an emotionally strong person.  Tonight, as I was picking things up around the house, I took some things into my bedroom and looked at my husband sleeping.  In that moment I knew exactly what direction this post was going to go.

   For those that don't know, my husband is an Army Infantryman.  He has served through 3 deployments in the middle east and has come out with countless awards including a Purple Heart and Bronze Star.  I am ridiculously proud of him.  But, before I get wrapped up in gushing about how awesome he is overall, I will keep to the point.  You see, as I looked at him lying in the bed sleeping after he had worked a 24 hour day yesterday, I realized something.  He embodies every sort of strength imaginable.

   My husband, well he is my Rock of Gibraltar.  He is unfailing in his love for me no matter how crazy I get.  He supports me and encourages me.  He fights for me and for our relationship.  He is the foundation upon which our family is built.  He is the glue that holds my insanity precariously together.  He works endlessly and tirelessly throughout the day and comes home exhausted.  Yet somehow, he always finds time to tell me how much he loves me.  He takes time to play with our daughter.  He lets us know we are important.

  He is not only strong for me, he is strong for his soldiers.  He has seen unimaginable things and been through situations no one should ever have to go through, but in it all, he always puts his guys first.  At every function someone takes the time to tell me how amazing he is.  And the funny part in all of it is that he wants none of the accolades.  He does it, because it is the right thing to do.  Not to be a hero, not to be well liked, but because it is necessary.  In that he shows me strength of character.

   Then there is the obvious sort of strength.  He is like a stinking pack mule.  I tried to put all of his equipment on before the last deployment and literally fell over.  He has to walk miles and miles with at least a hundred pounds of added weight strapped on.  That is just crazy people!  So in that, he shows physical strength.  I also think it shows great mental strength to push through it all.

  It is not just my husband's strength that keeps me going though.  I was lucky enough to have a mom that prepared me for the life of an Army wife.  She taught me to be independent, to be courageous, and above all how to use a screwdriver.  I would not be able to survive the life I lead if it weren't for her strong steady influence growing up.  She taught me how to be strong.  Even now when I forget, she is there to remind me.

  I have been overwhelmingly blessed in this life with an abundance of examples of what it means to be strong.  With the people I love at my back, I feel almost invincible.  Izzy has to face some extremely hard times in See How She Runs.  Here is a little snippet of her showing her strength.



"Alright, distance and no friendship.  This was just going to be a barrel of laughs.  Not that saving the world and taking down and evil corporation should be fun, but the heroine should at least have some perks.  Maybe a bat cave or some shiny weapons.  Instead I got the Olympic Wilderness and a bipolar sensei.  I would have to make the best of it, just like my mom taught me." -Izzy

xoxo
Michelle